Platform: iPhone

SteamWorld Heist

I really don’t play my 3DS nearly as much as I should. I don’t think this is all my fault, though, as a lot of developers keep on making huge, sprawling epics rather than bite-sized chunks of joy that I actually have the time to play. If developers could bear in mind those of us that have full-time jobs, significant others and interests other than gaming in mind, that’d be great.

I say all of this because I’ve found that SteamWorld Heist is a perfect package in just about every way. It’s a perfectly accessible, turn-based strategy game, meaning I didn’t have hours of tutorials to work through. It’s perfectly suited to the 3DS, taking advantage of the layered 3D effects. On top of this, it’s the perfect length, meaning ten hours later and I’d seen and done mostly everything, leaving me completely satisfied.

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Kero Blaster

Kero Blaster continues the current trend for retro style shooters upping the difficulty whilst taking the graphics back to a blocky 8-bit style. Unfortunately whilst there is fun to be found, fiddly controls and a hefty price tag lower its value.

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Groundskeeper 2

It seems to be the case that with every passing generation, games try to give us more – sometimes because we demand it, other times because it’s a tick to add to the list of features or another way to monetise the game. So we receive bonus modes, enhanced graphical fidelity, increased simultaneous players, bigger worlds and weapon selections, extra DLC stages, and of course fancy hats and horse armour to buy.

Whereas it’s sometimes nice to have more content than we probably know what to do with, not all games need to take this approach. Take OrangePixel’s Groundskeeper 2 for instance, which eschews complexity in favour of a basic and claustrophobically small 2D arena which you’re thrown into along with hordes of robot aliens, your sole objective being to shoot them all and gather their remains. What decade is this, the 1980’s?

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One Eyed Monsters

Since Bejeweled revolutionised the way we puzzle on-the-go, many other games have tried to capitalise on its success with varying results. Layer 8 Software are one of the latest devs to weigh in with their Tetris-like puzzler, One Eyed Monsters.

Is it a worthy challenger to the Bejeweled crown, or just another failed attempt at toppling the king?

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Sonic Jump

It’s not the first time that Sonic has dabbled in unknown territory, with some mixed results. Sonic Jump first came out a few years ago in Japan as a mobile video-game, and Sega has decided to finally let the Western world experience it. However, is Sega’s latest studio, Hardlight, up for the task, or is Sonic Jump just another nail in the coffin for the old blue hedgehog?

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Commando Jack

There are hordes of tower defense style video-games out there. Needless to say, it’s understandable that players will often miss out on a few because of the breadth of what is on offer.

So with that in mind, it’s very brave of Colossal Games to develop a mobile video-game in this genre. Commando Jack seems to have a few interesting ideas, but is it enough to make sure that it gets some attention?

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iBomber Defense: Pacific

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the last decade or so, the words ‘tower’ and ‘defence’ in the same sentence will cause you to either get excited or sigh with boredom depending on your stance. The concept of having to place turrets and blockades to stop waves of plodding enemies from destroying your base was popularised years ago by Flash titles like Desktop Tower Defense, and since then has been butchered and reinvented more times than the Lib Dem manifesto.

I, for one, have largely missed the attraction and have spent most of my gaming life actively avoiding the tedium of essentially building a wall and waiting to see if it falls down under duress. However, the life of a games reviewer isn’t all Skyrims and Darknesses and I figured sooner or later I’d have to review one. So here it is; iBomber Defense: Pacific. Developed by Cobra Mobile and released by the seemingly-omnipresent Chillingo it takes the basic TD mechanic and throws it into a sexy WW2 setting. Is it enough to turn a life-long hater into a fan? We’ll see…

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One Epic Game

Have you ever felt like games these days take themselves too seriously? I’ve always wondered how, despite decades of repetition, developers can still send big dudes off on ‘save the world’ missions with a straight face. Maybe it’s telling that some of the biggest and most revered titles of our generation (Gears, CoD, Elder Scrolls), all seem to contain nuggets of humour and sometimes a self-awareness that breaks the fourth wall and raises a chuckle amidst the bloodshed.

Prepare to have that wall well and truly smashed with One Epic Game, the new arcade platformer from Grip Games. No, I haven’t heard of them either, but who cares? Taking influences equally from Canabalt and Metal Slug, the game seems to not only play fast and loose with suspension of disbelief but downright makes fun of the fact it’s a video-game. The big question is: does it work? Well, mostly…

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The Simpsons Arcade

It’s funny how one of my most anticipated games this year rolls in at a mere 18 megabytes. Of course size isn’t everything, but when you consider some demos breach the 2GB mark, it’s clear times have changed.

I grew up with Konami games in the Arcades, and getting the chance to own Turtles, X-Men and now The Simpsons is like a dream come true for my inner retro-enthusiast. Not only can I relive my childhood, catering to the longing pangs of a cherished yesteryear, I’ll finally be able to see the end of a beloved arcade game without having forced my parents to take out a second mortgage.

They’ll welcome back those jingling pockets with open arms, I’m sure.

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Hank Hazard: The Stunt Hamster

Hank is a cute, yet rather ambitious hamster, who someday dreams of becoming the master of all stunts. That’s no mean feat as he has plenty of competition with Joe Danger and Tony Hawk nipping at his tail. Yet he remains optimistic, and, who knows, with your help, his dreams could well become a reality.

Would you say no to that face?

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Superman (iOS)

Everyone has a favourite superhero and mine has always been the Superman. From year dot I’ve been enamoured with the Man of Steel and everything to do with him. I’ve watched all the Christopher Reeve movies so many times over, I had a costume when I was three and have the John Williams theme on my iPod. Unfortunately, myself and those like me have been repeatedly subjected to ill-judged, jaded and downright pathetic attempts to bring our beloved Kal-El to life in video-games; to the point where Superman is considered one of the most misrepresented superheroes in gaming history.

Tiger Games, in conjuction with Chillingo, Warner Bros and DC recently had a go at doing our boy justice with their Superman game on the iOS systems. As I tentatively redeemed the code and downloaded the game, I crossed my fingers hoping for something at least decent. What I got was just that, but nothing much more.

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Review: Dizzy: Prince of the Yolkfolk

Gamers have a ton of respect for their history. No matter which format they started out on, or whether they’re a fanboy of a particular brand or not, everyone has their heritage, and thinks very favourably of it.

Mine harkens back to the days of the Commodore 64, and to a little white egg with boxing gloves called Dizzy. I spent many hours solving puzzles with my peculiar oval buddy, as we traipsed the land of Yolkfolk in search of riches and princesses.

It’s been years since then, and while many games have come and gone, Dizzy has remained a constant, beloved memory of mine. I’d almost given up hope that I’d ever see him again. That is until three weeks ago, when Codemasters scrambled my brains by rebooting the hard-boiled hero. For a moment, I was on top of the world.

However, now that it’s had a chance to sink in, and our adventures together can finally continue, I face a daunting question. Were they actually worth the wait?

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Review: Santa’s Sleigh Ride

Christmas is nearly upon us, believe us or not. The year has flown by, hasn’t it? It certainly has. Soon we will be reflecting on the year that has been, a year of great video-games and the Arab uprising.

To get yourself into the festive mood, TIMJ will be doing an array of coverage of Christmas-themed games, and it all starts here with Sleigh Ride. Will the game get you in the mood for the holidays, or will it be like the sprouts you leave at the dinner table?

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Review: Spintrip

I use my iPod Touch mainly for it’s intended purpose, listening to music, as well as accessing my e-mails, Lovefilm, Amazon and even my bank. It’s true that smart little touchscreen devices have come a huge distance in the last ten years, now functioning like futuristic palmtop computers. One thing I don’t use mine for much is gaming; I find most games use the touchscreen poorly, preferring to project awkward-to-use buttons in the foreground rather than properly use the highly advanced, multi-touch screen and in-built accelerometers.

So it’s odd that I find myself reviewing yet another iOS game, and it’s no surprise that it’s a quirky, mildly original puzzle platformer with a story that makes no sense and all the appeal of a Dali painting on fire. Okay, so maybe I’m being a bit cynical and I should really give Spintrip from Clickgamer.com a fair crack. So here’s my fair crack…

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Review: Candy Town

Match-three games are a dime a dozen, a genre about as over-played as the hidden object genre, which I still cannot grasp why they are even made. Something about ‘it relaxes the mind’ apparently. So needless to say, when Clickgamer.com entered the iTunes store to make a quick buck on a match-three style game, I immediately thought that the experience was going to be dull and boring. I expected a twitch game that kept you interested for all of five seconds before it became condemned to the shadows of your iOS icons, but were my preconceptions warranted?

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Review: Tintin (iOS)

It’s taken a long time to bring Tintin to cinema screens. Steven Spielberg first acquired the rights to the series back in 1983, shortly after Herge (the artist behind the original comic books) died. Since then, it’s been a case of scheduling conflicts and long-standing battles, but finally, this year, The Secret of the Unicorn has made the cut.

It’s been a true labor of love for all involved and, in addition to the rave reviews the film has received from critics across the board, Ubisoft have also managed to successfully convert the series into an engaging and entertaining console gaming release.

So, surely the mobile release from Gameloft is also destined to be a hit, right?

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Review: Cut the Rope

If you’ve never genuinely believed that cutting a piece of rope could be fun, then you’ll probably never want to drink pints with Zeptolabs, as they’ve made a whole game about it. It’s also worth me mentioning that, next to Angry Birds, it has become the most popular game on iOS devices. So, rope-cut hater, you’re in the minority.

Being a curious individual, and slightly perplexed by this phenomenon, I decided to take a look for myself

Several hours later…

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Review: Roll in the Hole

Blizzard aren’t the only ones with Panda fever at the moment, Eccentricity Games have somewhat of a flair themselves with their latest game, Roll in the Hole. Quite where the idea of rolling a big, fat ball of a Panda around while collecting ice cream came from is anyone’s guess, and certainly doesn’t run parallel with Blizzard’s warrior monk stance. What we do have is a charming little romp that is actually quite entertaining and worth getting your paws on…

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Review: Super Crossfire

‘Games as art’ is a phrase that is catching on a lot more of late. With luscious visual worlds, scarily lifelike facial animations and bright, vivid colours, it’s not hard to see why. However, it’s not just high-end PC’s and current gen consoles dishing out the quality, the mobile market is also in on the trend, and doing its part equally well.

Never is that more true than with Super Crossfire from Radian Games.

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Review: Galaxy Express

It’s not often that we review iPhone games on this site of ours. You see, much like the entire catalogue of the Wii, the good stuff is far outweighed by the sheer amount of shovelware, and who can be bothered to browse through the thousands of games to find something worth reviewing? Occasionally, though, developers and publishers will email us directly to pitch their game, and we decide whether to review these or not on a case-by-case basis. On Friday I received one such email from the PR of Canada’s Arctic Empire.

They certainly talked the talk when it came to promoting their newly relaunched puzzle game, Galaxy Express; with a witty pitch involving YouTube clips of Sean Connery voicing a dragon, which clearly just demanded my time. With my interest piqued by their humour and confidence, I set about to see if Galaxy Express was worth its new price of just under a quid…

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Review: Backbreaker: Vengeance

I think it is safe to say that I am widely regarded as the resident Sports Freak around the TIMJ offices, as I have something of an unhealthy passion for almost anything that constitutes sporting competition. As such, when titles such as Backbreaker: Vengeance come along I am usually somewhere near the head of the queue, jumping up and down, arms waving and shouting “Me! Me!” when the question of “Who wants it?” is asked.

Developed by NaturalMotion Games as a kind of spin off to last year’s Backbreaker title, Vengeance puts you in the uniform of an American Football team but does away with all the boring parts like scrimmage and tactics. Instead it focuses on the crunching tackles and speed that make the game so exciting to its fans (lockouts aside). Question is, does this maximise the gaming fun or leave you feeling a little short changed? Read on to find out.

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Review: Hard Lines

Remember when the first properly stylish mobile phones came about? Small enough to slip in your pocket and sleek enough to avoid looking like a prat on the bus, they sold like hot cakes. One thing that kept gamers happy was a simple little game that many people sunk many hours into; Snake. The premise and execution were perfect for the fiddly keypads. Sessions could last as long as you wanted and comparing high scores with your friends became a regular lunchtime activity. Then, with the advent of smart phones and ‘proper’ games on mobiles, good old Snake was lost in the tide.

It seems Spilt Milk Studios Ltd think it’s time to bring it back with their new game for iPhone and iPad, Hard Lines! Will it conjure up memories of playground/bus stop/office break fun or just remind us how blistered our thumbs got? Let’s find out…

 

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