Nintendo 2DS: Who’s it for?

August 28, 2013, Author: Matt Parker

Nintendo, as everyone knows by now, don’t play the same game as Microsoft and Sony. Nintendo are happy to live in their own unique little world and carry on cranking out games and hardware that no-one else would. It’s why I love them.

It’s also why I hate them. They can’t take the easy route and some of their decisions just seem plain odd. Today’s news of a new piece of hardware being launched by the Japanese giants seems to have landed on the wrong side of ‘what are they thinking?‘. So let’s look at what this new piece of kit is and perhaps we’ll be able to figure out its intended audience as well.

The short version of just what the 2DS (actual name) is goes a little like this:

It’s a 3DS that doesn’t do 3D.

You want more? How about the fact it’s single piece of plastic. No more clam-shell design, meaning the screens are forever exposed. Has that sold you yet?

Who wants this console? Asking for a friend.

Who wants this console? Asking for a friend.

Like I said, it’s taken me a little while to figure out who Nintendo will think needs this. For my money, this is aimed at parents who want to keep their kids happy this Christmas. Nintendo are here to save parents that don’t earn a fortune and who have kids that will be bombarded by adverts for consoles costing £350+.

Here’s my how I came to my conclusion.

Size and design of the console

It's pretty small. Pretty small like a pretty small child. Coincidence?

It’s pretty small. Pretty small like a pretty small child. Coincidence?

Thanks to ONM for the image above. You can clearly see that the 2DS is now the smallest of the 3DS consoles. Not the most portable, because it doesn’t fold up, but definitely the smallest when playing.

You know what else is small? Small children. The pieces are already falling into place.

Release date
I’m no conspiracy nut but when you’re releasing a new handheld console on the same day as a new Pokemon game, you can’t tell me that’s coincidence.

That’s right; the 2DS is launching (in the UK) on the 12th of October. Same day as Pokemon X & Y.

“Oh, really? That’s the same day? I didn’t know!” Pull the other one, Nintendo.

You know who loves Pokemon? A lot of people, actually. As part of the ‘a lot of people’ demographic, small children are well represented.

3D causes brain tumour cancer psychosis contagion disease
Yep. We all know how dangerous 3D is to little ‘uns, so it’s about time Nintendo did something to save our kids! Lord knows we can’t do it by taking responsibility of what our children play. You also expect parents to be aware of the fact there’s a slider on every version of the 3DS that can be turned all the way down so that the 3D effect is off.

It would be the act of a negligent parent to NOT buy a 2DS is what I’m saying.

This man's neck has lost the power to support his head. All thanks to the 3DS...

This man’s neck has lost the power to support his head. All thanks to the 3DS…

Dat RRP!
The new console will launch at a low price point. Christmas is saved!

Whilst no official RRP has been announced, GAME are selling pre-orders for £109. With GAME hardly being the most competitive of stores, it’s safe to say this isn’t a typo or an aggressively subsidised price, but a confirmation of Nintendo’s ‘aiming low’ policy.

This video
This is a stretch, but just listen.

Have a look at the video and you’ll see, at about the 35 second mark, Nintendo’s ideal vision of the console in use.

What’s happening? Well, some young whippersnapper is on their 2DS, having a grand time no doubt. Yet what’s this? Papa Nintendo Fan is sitting there with a proper 3DS. Notice the dirty look he gives his offspring. It says:

“No. You can’t have this 3DS. It’s mine. Enjoy your cheap 2DS. Doesn’t even fold up! Go cry to your Momma, but it won’t help! You know why? Your Momma’s my wife! How you like them apples!?”

You then see the child, no doubt ashamed of his console’s inability to fold-up and protect its screens, stash the handheld in a Nintendo branded protective sleeve.*

So that’s it. I think the 2DS is a neat idea and gives parents a great way to introduce their kids to the world of DS and 3DS games without worrying about price or 3D-induced, life-threatening medical conditions.

*Sold separately.**